Ok. Yep. Ok.
I've had a few discussions about this one. And I've had a lot of people tell (yell...) both sides of the story at me.
Point of view is important, no?
Sure. Of course it is.
My point of view?
I do NOT believe that ADHD is a superpower.
I'll never forget the first time this notion was presented to me. I was looking for a trusted psychologist to make my diagnosis. I wasn't sure where to start, but was pretty certain I had ADHD. I decided to start off by talking to an ADHD specialist therapist.
I remember explaining my symptoms, my thoughts and feelings...I remember talking about all the things I was able to do...but hadn't yet gotten to the things I couldn't do.
And then, BOOM. Out of the blue, in the middle of our one and only session, my (ex) therapist said,
"Well. Jay you sound amazing, and if you have ADHD, then you clearly have a superpower!"
I couldn't explain it at first, but it felt like they had just punched me in the tits, pulled my pants down, and then expected me to be thankful for it.
"Ummmm, it sure does NOT feel like a superpower" I stammered.
"But look at all the things you are able to do! Look at all you've done! That takes a real superpower to do all of that!"
At this point, I can't help but think to myself, 'I smell a hint of toxic positivity. And it stinks.'
I don't remember much of the rest of the call (but I did go for my diagnosis literally 2 weeks later).
The thing is, ADHD has enabled me to do some bonkers amazing things. I recognise that a good deal of my dedication to my cello has come from ADHD. I understand that ADHD is my specialty in coaching and mentoring. I am aware that my ADHD hyperfocus has allowed me to learn and do all kinds of bonkers, random, and awesome stuff.
But for many of us, ADHD comes with a massive, hefty, and often painful price.
If ADHD is a superpower...then it's also kryptonite.
Let me explain.
The number of comorbidities I have experienced, as a direct result of having ADHD, has been terrifying. My life has quite literally been on the line too many times to mention, and I often wonder how the hell I'm still alive today. There have been times where, quite frankly, it's been a miracle that I'm still on this planet.
At present, I have been diagnosed and or labelled with:
PTSD, cPTSD, "high functioning" anxiety, severe depression, RSD, Emotional Dysregulation, and a whole bunch of other stuff I can barely remember.
(Hah. The ADHD irony.)
The majority of these are ADHD comorbidities. And I still pay the price for some of those comorbidities today.
Another view as to why I struggle to view ADHD as a superpower - my psychiatrist has strongly suggested I be medicated for my ADHD. This would result in me being able to "calm my mind and focus better", etc etc.
So...I would ask...if it's a superpower...why would I take medication to suppress it (and/or attempt to eliminate as many of the symptoms of ADHD as possible)?
Surely we should be celebrating my ever-racing mind?
Shouldn't we be joyous that I left all the cupboard doors open (again)?
Aren't we pleased that I neglected my assignments until the very last second, and then broke myself cramming them in with literally -3 minutes to spare, and having no recollection of what I wrote?
Why are we trying to stop me from losing my phone for the sixteenth time today?
(Y'know, I got an Apple watch a few weeks ago, and there's a feature whereby you can make your phone ping even if it's on silent, and I'm already wondering if it's possible for that feature to just...wear out or something... Thank god I never let my phone battery run flat, GEEEEEZE.)
Look, I get it. There have been AMAZING things happen to me as a result of my ADHD. But I am NOT superhuman. I do NOT have a superpower. I am NOT above and beyond the level of humanity.
The only way I might be more special than others...well I'm not. Being me as a person makes me pretty goddamn special, and that's it.
I do not believe that ADHD is a superpower.
I respect people's opinions who believe otherwise; and I respect that some might say they feel it is, because it helps them as a coping mechanism, or it makes them feel good, or anything else which works specifically for them.
But for me, and MANY other people I've spoken to...it does NOT feel like a superpower.
More often than not...it feels like a considerable pain in the ass, which I'm having to somehow use to my advantage, hoping and praying that it works.
Living ones life by the seat of ones ADHD pants?
It might look fun, games, and a weirdly amazing level of productivity and output, from the outside. But let me tell you...
Quite often, there's a whole world of batshit craziness going on, on the inside.
Online Group Coaching Course Now Open:
Enrolment for the next 8 week online group coaching course Love Me, Love My ADHD is now open! I'm SOOOOOOO excited for this. Gearing up for launch No.2, after the successful feedback of The ADHD Love Notes used in my Founding Members launch last year!
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VIP package has 1:1 coaching and mentor sessions, monitored private group access, follow-up support, AND bonus material. DOORS CLOSE ON FRIDAY 12th FEBRUARY, and there are LIMITED VIP SPACES. After this, the course will not be available again until towards the end of 2022, so you need to secure your place ASAP. (Want to pay a deposit to at least secure your space? Drop me an email.)
It's time to finally step things up a bit, invest in your emotional and mental health, and give yourself permission to receive all the love and support you deserve.
I've got you, and you've got this.
